How do you break up with someone you live with?
A lot of people are ready to break up or they feel the other person wants to break up but someone is not moving out. The short answer is to move out.
Move Out
A lot of people feel overwhelmed with guilt that the other person needs them, can’t live without them, or is going to fall apart. These are all excuses, which are keeping you from moving out. This usually falls under the category of pathological altruism.
This is where you are helping somebody at the expense of you. This is never a good idea, it’s always a setup for disaster because you cannot help somebody else at the expense of yourself without the resentment building up, and eventually blowing up.
Do yourself a favor, do the other person a favor and look after yourself. This is not selfish, it’s called being an adult and move out. It’s not fair to the other person if you’re not wanting to be in a relationship anymore. It’s not fair to drag it out or not give them a chance to move on. It’s not fair to you, and it’s not fair to the other person. They’re an adult and they’ll be able to find their way. Breaking up with someone is hard, and there will be some emotions about that.
Don’t Stay Friends with Your Ex
So many people think it’s a good idea to stay friends with their ex, but it’s not. Whoever initiated the breakup is torturing the other person. It’s giving them hope that things may reignite someday. If the other person initiated the breakup, you’re only hurting yourself by staying friends.
This will also hurt the people you end up being with. Whoever your ex is with and whoever you’re with next, will be hurt. It’s very painful for someone to try and process whether you want to be with an ex, no matter how you play it. This is just setting yourself up for a problem.
Do Not Talk About Your Exes with Your Next Significant Other
It’s a test. If someone asks you about your ex, they want to know how you handled it, not what happened. Don’t make the mistake of thinking they want to hear about the drama, they want to hear a balanced approach about what happened. Sharing the blame is the healthiest most balanced approach to take.
If you have any questions or would like help with how to break up with someone you love with, call, or text anytime at 757-340-8800 or go to WWW.DRLDABNEY.COM.
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