How do you get over a crush? I find that people beat themselves up about a relationship that didn’t pan out the way they hoped it would.
Don’t Beat Yourself Up
Don’t beat yourself up over this! There is something symbolic about the person that’s causing you to have these feelings, and you need to pay attention.
They Have Flaws Too
Also, it’s often an ideal understanding of this person that may help you move on. Just because you haven’t got involved with them and you haven’t got to see their faults, doesn’t mean they don’t have them. They are human, I’m 100% sure they have faults. So, it may help to understand they have flaws, just because you haven’t seen them doesn’t mean they aren’t there.
Stop Seeing Them
This seems very hard for some people to understand, they seem to think they can’t stop seeing them, they’re compelled. We’re all grownups, we can control ourselves, do whatever you have to do to set that up, and stop seeing them.
It’s so important because seeing them is a painful stimulus to you, and by continuing to allow that in your life, you’re just hurting yourself. It’s like having a splinter under your skin, and it’s getting infected, and you won’t have it removed because it’s from something meaningful to you. It really is that strange to keep exposing yourself to something so painful.
Some people think there will never be a chance if you stop seeing them. It’s important to understand that this is not true. They’re healthy adults, who can hold on to the memory of you and if something changes in their life, they’ll find you.
It is not a matter of, “If I stay in their life, I have a chance.” Or, “ If I get out of their life, I don’t have a chance.”
The point is to get the pain out of your life. Cut that off some way by seeking help from a friend, a coach, or rearrange your schedule that way you don’t run into this person. Certainly don’t stay friends.
Unrequited love is something you can deal with and move on from if you follow these tips.
Do you have any questions? Or would you like some help with how to get over a crush? We’re always here for you at 757-340-8800, or www.drldabney.com.
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